Mental Health

How to Be Kinder to Yourself

Do you notice how mean and critical we can be to ourselves? When other people make a mistake I am much more understanding and patient with them than I am with myself when I make a mistake. Having some self compassion is a really important part of self-care and, in my opinion, it can get really overlooked. Let’s take a look at some of the ways that we can all be a little kinder to ourselves.

Celebrate Yourself

Celebrate the things that you accomplish. You’re doing great things every day. Recognize those accomplishments and congratulate yourself on them! Even if you’re having a bad day and you feel like all you did was mess up all day. Pick something you did. Recognize that you tried and let yourself know that it’s a good thing.

Nurture Your Advocate

You’re probably really familiar with your self critic. They’re the ones coming in with mean words and judgement. How familiar are you with the nicer voice in your head though. Now, don’t get me wrong, the critic can be very motivating, but they can also really bring you down. So, make sure you’re also saying nice, positive things to yourself. You probably won’t be able to completely shut your critic up and like I said, it can be helpful. So, when that voice stops being helpful to you, it’s time to become your advocate. Respond to the critic with kind words about yourself. Keep at it.

Forgive Yourself

We all make mistakes. Start forgiving yourself for yours. Failures and mistakes are apart of life. You wouldn’t berate a child (or even a friend) constantly for the mistakes that they’ve made. You forgive them, teach them, and help them move on. Start doing that with yourself! This isn’t the first mistake you’ve made and it won’t be the last. It’s okay. You’ll get better.

Treat Yourself

You don’t need to break the bank to treat yourself. Grab your go to comfort item and take a breather. Especially after a hard day. Just give yourself the opportunity to relax. Take a bath, grab a book, listen to that song that lifts you up. Now that doesn’t mean you can’t treat yourself to some retail therapy as well. Just don’t overspend if you can’t afford it quite yet.

Take a Break

If you’re able to, take a mental health day. Put everything not essential on hold for the day or even an hour. Do something that you enjoy. Be kind to yourself during that time. Recharge and prepare to tackle whatever it was that was bringing you down in the first place. It’s okay to take a breather every once in a while.

Being kinder to yourself is such an important part of self care and is so easily missed. I hope this helps you be kinder to yourself! This was especially important for me to write because I was being extra hard on myself and I also needed the reminder to be nicer.

Let me know what you think! Are you guilty of being meaner to yourself than you should be?

Thank you so much for stopping by and I’ll see you next time.

Mental Health

The Benefits of a Daily Routine

If you’re a parent, I’m sure you know that a routine is really good for your baby. It’s a lot easier to plan out your day if you now little one is going to be hungry or sleepy around a certain time. Were you aware that structuring a routine for your day will also benefit you?

As a person with bipolar disorder, a routine is especially important for me. However, it wasn’t until I had my daughter that I really got serious about a daily routine. Now that I have one, both me and my daughter are having much better days! I’m better at detecting reasons why my daughter is in a certain mood and I’m feeling more stable and am noticing changes in my mood better as well. So, today, let’s take a look at why a routine is good for everyone.

More Productive

You are going to be one of those people who gets all their work done, cooks healthy dinner, and goes to the gym! All right, maybe not right away. If you create a routine and stick to it, things will start becoming second nature. Plus, if you schedule out a chunk of time to do something, you’re more likely to do it and not procrastinate. Of course, things in life can always come up, but just structuring your day is the first step in helping you get all those things done!


When you create a routine you are helping to prioritize self-care. You aren’t going to schedule out your day and not include times to shower, relax, (and hopefully) exercise. There have been times in my life where everything got away from me. I was so wound up and busy taking care of everyone else, that I wasn’t taking care of myself. I finally took a shower and while I was still stressed, just being clean made me feel like I could keep going. A routine helps me take care of me and still take care of my family.

Good Habits

I want to be the kind of person who wakes up early, has some time to themselves for a few minutes, and then gets my kid up and ready for her day. I also want to exercise and meditate every day. When I was just “winging” my days, I never had time to do those things. I was also relying on my daughter to wake me up because I was staying up later than I should to fit in all the things I didn’t get to while she was awake.

Scheduling my days, I realize I have time to do those things during the day. I may not be at the point where my day is thrown off if I do skip an exercise day, but I’m beginning to plant those seeds and am beginning to create all those positive changes that I want.

Healthy Sleeping Habits

Sleep is so important for our bodies. When you start getting a consistent sleeping routine, your body just naturally takes to it. We’ve all had those days, when you’re supposed to be off of work, but your body missed the memo and wakes you up anyway. With a routine, you (and your body) know when to sleep and when to wake up. You’re probably also adding in some much needed relaxation before bed as well. So, getting to sleep can be easier and you should be sleeping better as well.

Reduces Stress. Increase Relaxation.

You no longer have to worry about scheduling out your hectic days right when you get up. You’re not scrambling around trying to get everything done and then somehow getting nothing done at the end of the day. Now, you have an idea of when (and how) you’re going to get everything done.

When everything is flowing and you’re going through your routine, you’re also helping yourself relax. You can minimize a lot of “what do I have to do next?” and the stress associated with that. Now, it might just be me, but seeing all of my accomplishments during the day makes me way more calm and relaxed at the end of the night.

There are some of the ways that getting yourself on a routine can help you! If you’re feeling down or in general just want to make some positive changes in yourself, start a routine! Do you already have a routine going or are you planning to start one? Let me know how you like or dislike it.

Thank you so much for stopping by! I’ll see you next time.


Do You Answer

Yesterday, I got a random knock on the door. I hate random knocks on the door. I’m currently living in an apartment and I feel like I get a lot. Especially recently. These past few weeks I’ve been getting knocks left and right. Apparently my apartment was chosen for some sort of health survey and we’d get x amount of dollars if we qualify for their assessment. I’m not really sure. It’s rude, but I zoned out on whatever pitch they were giving my husband.

Now, I’m not sure if the people who have been knocking are the ones who are doing this survey. However, it very well could be. They tried to make an appointment with my husband, who politely declined and said he had a hectic schedule. It was after his chat with them that the unexpected door knock has really picked up.

I hate it. I don’t answer the door unless I’m expecting someone. I don’t care who it is, if I’m not expecting you, don’t even bother knocking. I also appreciate a “I’m here” text, that way when you do arrive, I know it’s you. However, as long as I’m expecting someone I’ll peek through the peephole and answer.

The only times I answer the door when it’s not for friends, is if I’m expecting a package or food. I feel that package (and food delivery) tracking has gotten so good, that it’s not a surprise to hear a knock from them.

I have always been like this. I don’t think it’s ever really been about fear. I just don’t like to be bothered. I don’t want to buy whatever you’re selling. I don’t want to hear about your religion. I’m not voting for whoever you’re campaigning for. I don’t have time to take whatever survey you’ve got. In my experience, an unexpected knock on the door is one of those things.

I don’t even try to hide it at this point. I used to keep everything so quiet as I tried to peer out the window and discover who it could possibly be. Now, I still quietly look out the window, but I don’t try to keep the rest of my house quiet. Which is probably a little bit rude, but it is my house. I shouldn’t feel bad for not wanting to answer the door and I shouldn’t feel the need to hide that I’m there.

This whole thing got me wondering if my behavior was the “norm” or if people actually answer the door and I’m just the weird one. I thought it would be fun to do a poll and see what other people do. So, please answer the poll and feel free to explain your answer in the comments!

Thank you so much for voting and for stopping by! I will see you next time!

Mental Health

Mental Health: My Beginnings

So, last week I opened up a bit about having bipolar disorder and how I want to be more open about it for my daughter (and for myself as well). We are going to dive into that a little bit more today.

There are a number of different factors that cause a person to become bipolar. Biological differences, genetics, etc. I believe exact causes are still relatively unknown. I know stressful and/or traumatic experiences can trigger that first bipolar episode. Today, we are going to discuss the events that I believe caused me to become bipolar.

Probable trigger warning for the rest of this post. Whether or not you read my story and experience, please, if you need help, skip to the very end where I have linked some websites that may be of assistance to you.

When I was 17, I entered into an incredibly unhealthy relationship. He cheated for, what I can only assume was, the entirety of our relationship. He was emotionally abusive and manipulative. The summer I turned 18, I got pregnant. Being young and “in love” he was able to convince me to not tell my parents. I went to college. He joined the military.

I spent seven months of my college career essentially alone and hiding a pregnancy. We obviously had no plan to keep the baby seeing as we were the only two people that knew about it. In March, I started going into labor. At least, I was in so much pain I could only assume I was going into labor. I was in my dorm room. I texted my friend and asked for a ride to the hospital. I checked myself in. They ran my blood, took an ultrasound, and then a nurse collected me. I remember her being very rude. I was scared and didn’t know what was going on, but I remember so clearly her going, “do you know your 40 weeks pregnant?”

I was brought into a room where nurses checked on me and they brought in a social worker to assist me in beginning the adoption process. The doctor/nurses and I decided the best option would be to do a C-section. So, once we were able to, I was brought into a room and we delivered my baby. She stayed in the NICU and I went to visit her all day, every day, for the three or four days I was there.

I didn’t tell anyone I was in the hospital. My boyfriend, although I think he was my fiance at that point, was doing training and didn’t have his phone. When I was discharged, I told everyone it was my appendix because I had to keep the lie going.

It was in those following months that I noticed the changes in behavior. There were days when I didn’t get out of bed and barely ate. I could keep track of the number of showers I had on one hand. I isolated myself even more than I already had because of all the lies and secrecy.

Then, I was up. I had probably taken too many of the pain medication that I was prescribed and feeling good. I reconnected with my friends and was on top of all my school work. I could do anything and everything.

Sometime during all this me and that boy broke up for good. I had a low period and finally arrived at a place where I felt like me, regular old me. It was at this point that I realized that I needed help. I knew I wasn’t doing well, so I found a therapist and I went to them. That’s when I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

We had a few sessions, but I ended up moving back home before any real work could be done. Since then I haven’t been able to start therapy back up and start working on treatments for myself. On a positive note, that will be changing after I find a doctor. I’ve already been looking to find people who I think is a good fit for me.

So, I’m not really sure how to end this post. It was a lot harder to get through than I expected it to be. Which is ridiculous because I don’t talk about that time in my life often, so of course, it would be difficult to completely open up like that.

The only thing I can think of is to tell you that no matter what you’re going through, there is someone who can help you. You are not alone.

Lifeline Crisis chat:
Lifeline Crisis Chat

Information on abusive relationships:
How to tell if you’re in an emotionally abusive relationship
National Domestic Violence Hotline
Leaving an emotionally abusive relationship

Information on helping others in abusive relationships:
Supporting someone in an abusive relationship
Helping loved ones in an emotionally abusive relationship


Sunshine Blogger Award

I was nominated for the Sunshine Blogger Award by Catey at OliveJuice. A million thank yous to her! Go check out her website and send her some love here.

The Sunshine Blogger Award is given to bloggers by bloggers. It recognizes them for their creativity, talent, and positivity. It is also a great way, in my opinion, to give a ray of sunshine to those you nominate for the award.

I am so honored to be able to share this with you all. I hope I can continue to put out content that is worthy of this nomination.

Sunshine Blogger Award Rules

  1. Thank the person who nominated you and provide a link back to their blogging site.
  2. List the Sunshine Blogger Award rules and display the logo on your site
  3. Answer the Sunshine Blogger Award questions.
  4. Nominate 11 other bloggers and ask them 11 new questions.
  5. Notify the nominees about their nominations by commenting on one of their blog posts.

Catey’s Questions

Why did you start blogging?

I’ve always loved to write. For the longest time I felt like it was the only thing I was good at. After I had my daughter, I couldn’t both work and take care of her. So, I stopped working to focus on her. Being stuck at home all day I started to get bored. I thought I would take up blogging to not only pass the time, but try and help others who may be in similar situations as I was. When I was pregnant I devoured any article I could on parenting.

If you could live in any period in history, when would it be and why?

Honestly, I’m pretty happy during this time period. I prefer learning and discovering all the wonderful things people in the past did. I don’t think I’d add any value to previous accomplishments. I have a shot at doing something wonderful and meaningful in this time period though.

What are three words that best describe you?

Short, stubborn, and caring.

I think these three words actually sums up my personality pretty well. I stick with things for as long as I’m able. I’m physically short, but also slightly short tempered. I also truly care about people. I want people to be happy and will do what I can to help others.

What’s a movie that you could practically quote, from start to finish?

Rent! I stumbled on the movie way back when and I watched it on repeat. I loved it so much that I bugged and bugged my mom to see it on Broadway as well. When they did the “live” production on Fox, I sang every word. My husband had the nerve to make a comment, “Oh, but when I do it during movies you yell at me”. Haha.

What are you currently reading?

I’m currently reading A Game of Thrones by George R.R Martin. That is the first book in the series. I got into it because of the TV series and since the series is almost done I figured I may as well read all the books to continue my Game of Thrones obsession.

Where did you work for your first job?

I got my first job at Denny’s! It was the biggest gift I ever could have asked for. I was 20, no job history whatsoever, and the manager took a chance on me. She is the greatest and I miss her (not necessarily the job) to this day.

What is one thing you learned in childhood that totally changed your life?

Don’t stress yourself over people who never make an effort.

Although I’m not sure if this would be necessarily considered childhood? I figured this out more so in highschool.

If sleep wasn’t necessary, what would you do with the extra time?

I’d alternate between reading, writing, and catching up on all the movies I say I’m going to watch. I’d probably spend an hour just staring at my baby sleep too. I love that girl, but she really makes it hard to do all the reading and writing I’d like to do during the day.

What’s the farthest from home you’ve ever been?

When I was younger (maybe 5ish) me and my mom visited my dad in Italy. He was stationed there, so we hadn’t seen him in a while. I very vaguely remember going to the beach with people who were baby sitting me and meeting a cute kid who I adored. We didn’t speak the same language, but I had the hugest crush on him. I also remember trying to explain salt by describing the girl with the umbrella on the label.

What is your favorite jellybean flavor?

I don’t really eat jellybeans that often. If lemon is a flavor, then I’d say that would probably be my favorite flavor.

What are you most grateful for today?

My husband. He may not always agree with me, but he supports me a million percent. Aside from my daughter, he’s my favorite person.

Questions for My Nominees

  1. Why did you start your blog?
  2. What is your favorite time of day and why?
  3. What is your favorite quality about yourself?
  4. Who is your go to person when you need help?
  5. If you could only eat one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be? Why?
  6. What do you do to relax?
  7. You have a billion dollars, what do you do with it?
  8. You can have one super power, what is it and why?
  9. Which do you think you have a better chance of beating: 10 human size geese or 20 goose size UFC fighters?
  10. Aliens visit Earth, you are tasked with choosing two people to represent us. Who do you pick and why?
  11. Tomorrow you wake up with the ability to learn and master any skill, what is it and why?

My Nominees (in no particular order)

  1. John
  2. Natasha
  3. Nyxie
  4. Britt
  5. Jenni
  6. Michelle
  7. J.
  8. Spence
  9. Megan & Crystal (and Company)
  10. Jenna
  11. Dayma

Thank you for stopping by and until I see you next, how about you check out the nominees? They’re pretty great.